I Remember When


I remember when I first heard this bizarre music on The X-Files.  It was on the episode about the Fiji Mermaid with the puzzle tattooed guy who ate raw fish.  They played one or two of these songs during the parts where that man was making masks in his shop at the freak show.  It only took a few seconds of being exposed to that music to make a big impression on me as a junior higher.  And for years I wondered who the artist was so I could buy his CD.

I remember when I heard this bizarre music on a Pringles commercial a while ago.  It was the one where the guy was on his porch in the bayou eating his Pringles when an alligator comes crawling up and opens it's mouth for a chip.  The song had these words: "I put a spell on you because you're mine!"  They didn't play this exact same song on that episode of The X-Files 5 or 6 years ago, but it sounded incredibly similar.  Now I had an idea of what to look for to track down the artist.  Thanks to the advent of Napster it only took a few minutes to find out that "I Put a Spell on You" was performed by Screamin' Jay Hawkins.  Huzzah and exultations!  Now I own 2 of his CDs: "Best of the Bizarre Cessions 1990 - 1994" and "Voodoo Jive."

I remember when I was listening to Screamin' Jay on the way to Home Depot to buy parts for my toilet which had broken.  I had a portable CD player connected to a 600 watt amplifier which ran 2 tweeters, 2 eight inch speakers and 2 twelve inch woofers.  I pulled into the parking lot with my windows down during Screamin' Jay's wild version of "Old Man River."  I turned the car off and went inside.  It took me 20 minutes to match my parts and buy them.  When I came back to my car, my CD player, amplifier, and one of my woofers were gone; so was Screamin' Jay.  That'll learn me to roll up my windows and lock the doors!

I remember when I took my greyhound for a walk in an open space park where the Boulder turnpike intersects Church Ranch Blvd.  I parked my car, got my dog out and locked the doors.  We got onto the bike path and went under the bridge.  When we came out the other side I could hear what sounded like several dogs yipping and howling off in the distance.  I pressed on in spite of what could have been interpreted as an early warning sign.

I led my dog off the bike path to explore a large open field.  About 50 yards from the path I turned around and saw 2 mangy coyotes trotting toward me and my greyhound.  They weren't very close so we kept on going further into the field.  After a while I turned around again and the coyotes were gone.  I found a nice place between two trees to sit down for a while.  When I stop walking and sit down, my greyhound will stay quiet for a while, but then he will start whining because he wants to keep going.

I got up and we circled around the opposite side of the field.  My greyhound started lagging behind me and was watching something behind us.  I looked back and the coyotes were back again.  I grabbed the knife in my pocket that I keep on my keychain and started dragging my dog back to the car.  The coyotes were following us.  There was a mid sized one and a smaller one trailing behind and to the left like a wingman.  It was like they were escorting us out of their territory.

I continued moving forward.  After 20 yards I glanced back again and they were right behind us.  So I turned around toward them and they started walking away.  I had to turn around about 5 times on the way back to the car to keep them at bay.  They must not have been mad with hunger enough to attack a man with a large dog.  With the expanding population, where else are these wild natives going to go?

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